your father blew smoke in your face to keep you quiet

he gave me his hands and I wasn't sure if I should take it,
press it to my face or hide it behind my neck

I dont love anyone who doesn't have dirty handsss


& when he's drunk, he tells me about the boys he has
kissed and where he wants to kiss me
I WILL KISS YOU MORE PASSIONATLY.

.

people seem to be leaving holes on my body. dirty holes. holy holes. bruised holes. and I carry them like I carry my bones. yesterday we spent the day in bed together, and you touched my holes and asked me who gave me them. I dont want to forget who gave me them, so I'm remembering everything. its seems that you like my bruises better than you like my bones, even though you buy me cigarettes.

I think we are worse when we're together. I dont really want to know what you think or feel about me. I feel so much on my own.

dying is an art, like everything else

jeg ville drepe deg
men du døde før jeg fikk sjansen til å . .
jeg var fjorten da du døde
når jeg var sytten prøvde jeg å dø
for å komme tilbake tilbake tilbake til deg

i steden ble jeg teipet sammen igjen
og da visste jeg hva jeg skulle gjøre;
jeg laget deg om til en gud uten en munn jeg kunne kysse
og jeg la meg vedsiden av deg
og jeg var lykkelig, for du var formet slik jeg er formet



i wear my stitches to show that something's missing

& i'm tired of being brave

the light lies on the walls, on my hands

I need to dance out of my skin, tear off my bones. just be whole and free.

take me out tonight, our bodies will be alcoholfueled

i will remind you how to spell your name

i will help you find your bed and wake you up to kiss you again and again and again at five in the morning

i will brush your teeth, and think that you're just the first boy i fell in love with and that's all you'll ever be.

fragile feelings. .

hello mr. good morning

dont look at me like that darlin, i'm a mess.

he poured love with his beautiful gentle hands, our hands met before we did. they crushed my body, leaving me blue, bruised and beautiful. you finally gave me something. I found some secret messages hidden in the palm of your hands too, in the lines that really is a map over your body.

oh, and your unkissed cheeks. .

evig & høyest elsket

-rør ikke ved meg, for dere vet ikke hva jeg har mistet!
-fortell oss hva du har mistet, så vi kan hjelpe deg med å lete. .
-jeg har sittet ved bordet til døden, sovet i senga til døden, og innhalert asken av de brente restene av alt vi hadde sammen. dere, dere. . dere har kun kysset den på munnen.


every day I lose a small fragment of you,
and then pieces of me run after them
because I'm not ready to let you go yet.

....

alle dere som leser bloggen min;
fortell meg hva dere drømmer om!

I owe you my heart

yes, I said you never were acquainted with my face, yet you wore it.
you resembled me!
your face begged for love,
and I kissed you,
because your lips fit mine perfectly


you were mine after all. .